Chapter 4 - Sadie Hawkins sings the blues
“What on earth is that?” Stella shrieked as she poked the oozing, leaking box in my hands.

“Honestly? I have no idea.” I shook my head, trying to decide whether to be grossed out or excited by Van’s latest gift.

“Oh go on and open it already,” Katie grumbled, sounding oh-so-bored from her perch on the top step. “Let’s get it over with.”

“I think it’s romantic,” Wally laughed. “Nothing says true love like…” I opened the top of the box. “demolished bakery products.” He swiped a chunk of chocolate cake and popped it in his mouth. “Huh,” he said through a cascade of crumbs that caused Katie to jump up and shriek, “still fresh.”

“What’d he do? Throw them in his backpack and ride his skateboard to school?” Katie rolled her eyes and moved away from the box as if it were a bomb.

“Knowing Van?” I said, picking through the gluten rubble. “Probably.” At last I rescued a mostly whole cupcake that Van had apparently made himself – a detail made clear by the black icing topped with a vibrant red X.

Stella snatched the cupcake and took a bite, talking with her mouth full. “I have got to get to know this kid – these are amazing!”

“I know!” Wally giggled, reaching in for another, “What’s up with his fetish for Xs though? I mean dude wears them on his clothes, his jewelry, even on that tat on the back of his neck.”

He had a tattoo on the back of his neck? I was about to question Wally further, when he suddenly gagged and spit the cake out into his hand. “What is this?” he yelled and pulled a soggy wad of paper out of the mess.

Picking it up gingerly, I opened it to find the word “go” written on it. “Um…” I stammered.

“Wait!” Stella jumped in, “There’s one in mine too!” She unfolded her piece of paper to read “Hawkins.”

“What the-?” I blinked several times, the words not getting any clearer.

“Ahem,” Katie cleared her throat from her position across the hallway. “I think it’s obvious that your Goth friend…”

“He’s not a Goth,” I said but Katie would not be interrupted.

“Is either a big Robert Louis Stevenson fan or,” she smacked her hand against a poster on the wall above the drinking fountain, “he’s asking you to the Sadie Hawkins Day dance.”

“Oooh, is Stevenson that new band?” Stella gasped. “I love them!”

Wally gave her a withering look before adding, “But that dance is a girl’s choice.”

Katie shrugged and rolled her eyes, “Yes, and nails and bike chains are generally considered hardware but that’s not stopped his daily parade of Home Depot haute couture.”

“He can’t do that!” Wally muttered indignantly. “It’s the one dance a year where us guys get to sit back and primp while the girls do all the running around. This totally sets a bad precedent.”

“Don’t worry, Wally,” Stella cooed, ruffling his hair, “you’re a champion primper. Besides, I’m sure someone will ask you to the dance.”

Wally’s eyes lit up, “Is that an offer?”

“No,” Stella smirked, “I’m going with Sweet Lou from the mini-mart, remember?”

Katie choked as Wally and I laughed. “Katie, doll, you taken?” he crooned.

Katie shrugged him off and turned to get a drink out of the fountain. We all knew she hadn’t asked anyone. “Come on Kate,” I said gently, “you have to go! It won’t be fun without you.”

“Are you asking me?” Katie looked pointedly at Wally.

“Dude!” He sighed. “It’s a girl’s…” His voice trailed off as Katie tapped her foot impatiently. “Okay, fine. Yes, I’m asking you. Happy?”

Katie smiled, careful not to show her teeth. “Pick me up at 7:30.”

“So are you going to say ‘yes’?” Stella asked, returning my attention to the cupcakes.

“Ooooh, are you? Are you?” Van popped up under my left elbow, between Stella and I, batting his eyes hopefully. Clapping his hands and giggling like a demented gerbil, he danced around me. “Don’t keep me in suspense any longer! I must know if I’m going to meet Sweet Lou the mini-mart god!”

Stella snorted chocolate cupcake out her nose and I smiled, “Yes, yes, of course I’ll go with you.”

Van slapped my locker and then clicked his heels joyously. “Yeee-hah!”

“But I make no promises about Sweet Lou,” I giggled.

“How long have you been standing there?” Katie sniped.

“Long enough to hear everything my dear,” he bowed low to her. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.”

“What secret?” She demanded hotly.

Turning to Wally, he winked, “How she, like, totally begged you to go to the dance with her. That was real big of you man, real big.”

“I did not!” Katie spluttered indignantly as Van planted a quick kiss on me before running off down the hallway, yelling something about being late for his Overachiever’s Anonymous meeting.

“I hate him!” Katie growled as the clanging from his wallet chain hitting his metal buckles died out.

“Well, I love him,” Wally rejoined, swiping the box out of my hands.

“I love him more,” Stella yelled, taking another cupcake from Wally.

“He’s totally taken, you two,” I laughed. I had to laugh. That was the only way to let out all the happy bubbles crowding up my throat.

“Do you love him?” Stella asked bluntly.

The question caught me off guard. How could I not love Van? And yet… I smiled at Stella and said nothing.

………

“Uh, Leigh-a, princess, your date’s here. I think.” My dad let the blinds snap back into place as he stepped back from the window.

“What?” I stuck my head out of the bathroom. “It’s, like, an hour too early!” Tugging at my sweats, I still had rollers in my hair and not a smidge of makeup on. Not that I’m a terribly vain girl, Van’s seen me sans accoutrement many times, but this is a dance for pete’s sake.

“Well, he’s definitely here,” my dad said, back at the window. “And definitely puking in our bushes.”

“What?!” I dropped my mascara tube and ran for the front door. Van straightened up as soon as I yanked the door open. “Are you okay?”

“Oh, yeah,” he panted between breaths, “totally…fine…no…worries.”

“Um, okay.” I wasn’t convinced and neither was my mom, who muscled my dad out of the way.

“Stand back, let me get a look.” My mom’s a nurse but I wasn’t sure who she was more worried about – Van or the prized azalea bush he had just barfed all over.

“I’m fine,” Van dug the heel of his hand into his side. “I just ran too hard to get here. That’s all. Just give me a sec and I’ll be fine.” He walked stiffly around the front yard, wiping his face with his sweat-soaked t-shirt. I caught a glint of metal from his nipple ring and looked anxiously at my mom to see if she’d noticed it. She hadn’t. Trowel in hand, she was already scooping the mess away from the bush and into the dirt. “I didn’t want to be late,” Van explained on his second lap around the yard.

“You’re so not late that it’s almost yesterday,” I replied.

“Still have to get ready, you see. Nice curlers, by the way,” Van laughed on his next lap.

“Thanks,” I muttered, blushing.

“Glad to see you’re not dressed yet – brought you a little something.” He finally stopped, dropping to his knees in front of me like he’d been hit over the head. Pulling his backpack off his sweaty shoulders, he produced a plastic bag and handed it to me.

“What’s this?” I asked warily. Stella had already spent an hour with me this afternoon picking out the perfect outfit. She would not be pleased to see her fashion sense had been flouted.

“Just something… a little fun, a little crazy.” He grinned crazily to emphasize his point. My mom looked up from her bush and my dad leaned out of the door.

“Crazy?” I arched an eyebrow as I reached into the sack and pulled out a sequined silver vintage flapper dress, complete with six inches of fringe. I was speechless as I turned the dress over in my hands.

“Put in on!” he enthused. “You’re going to look stunning.”

“Yeah, stunning in a deer-blinding kind of way,” Kent giggled, peering around my mother.

I glared at him. “Oh good, Kent is here, now everything is just rainbows and unicorns.”

“Isn’t the theme ‘Dancing through the Decades’?”

“Yes…” And remind me to smack the next person I see from the dance committee. “But that doesn’t mean you have to dress to the theme!”

“But it will be so much more fun this way! Blending in is boring,” he admonished me.

“He’s right,” Kent grinned. “And going as the disco ball is so much more original than just some 70’s throwback wig and platforms.”

The mention of shoes sparked something in my mom and she lit up. “Oooh! I have just the thing! I never thought I’d have a chance to wear them after Aunt Melda’s wedding but this is perfect…” A few minutes later she popped out holding a pair of silver-studded four-inch monstrosities.

“Mrs. Mitchell!” Van smiled appreciatively, “Those are some seriously rockin’ shoes.”

My mom smiled in a way I hadn’t seen her smile in years. The blush alone made her look ten years younger. “Thank you, Van. I knew there was a reason I kept them.”

“And oh yeah, could I borrow your shower?” My dad paused only a moment before laughing and ushering Van inside.

………

At home I had felt gaudy enough but by the time we got to the school, I felt downright garish. Van had emerged from my bathroom, some forty minutes after his shower, in a high-waisted pin-stripe suit with silver spats, an argyle ascot and slicked-down hair. All visible piercings were removed and he had even tucked a red rose into his buttonhole. The only thing of the Old Van that remained was the loop of chain running to his back pocket, which now looked stylishly vintage.

As he swaggered up the front steps to the gym, I teetered on his arm, trying vainly to shrink into his side. My mom had gotten into the spirit of things and talked me into letting her finger-wave my hair, line my eyes and give me a fake mole. I was desperately regretting ever leaving my house when I heard Stella’s signature scream. “Aaaaah! Leigh! You look gor-GEOUS! Who knew you had legs like those?” Smacking her date, a smarmily cute guy much older than high school, she demanded, “Doesn’t she have amazing legs?”

“Yeah, baby,” he drawled, staring way too long at my legs. “Sweet thing has totally hot...” He tugged at his snug seventies cowboy shirt with pearl buttons that were undone just far enough to showcase a fuzz of chest hair. He practically oozed slime.

“Gams. I believe the word you are looking for, my fine fellow, is gams.” Van’s smile was icy sharp. “And yes, she does.”

Sweet Lou smiled lazily at us, the only one in the group apparently missing Van’s implied warning. We were saved by the advent of Katie and Wally and the ensuing round of compliments and questions.

“I can’t even believe this is you,” Katie said, fingering the silver hem. “It’s just so…”

“Crazy?” I finished.

“Unlike you,” she corrected. “And yes, crazy too.” A strange look swept over her doll-like face. “I didn’t even know you owned anything besides jeans and hoodies.”

“Actually, I don’t. It’s a gift from Van.”

At the mention of his name, Van broke off his staring match with Sweet Lou and tugged at my elbow. “Whaddya say we dance and show these guys a real Charleston?” Before I could protest that I wasn’t a good dancer, or even admit that I had no idea a Charleston was anything but a candy bar, he was dragging me out on the floor. I sighed. At least if I was going to make a complete fool of myself, nobody would recognize me in this getup.

Two hours later I had learned that Van didn’t know what a Charleston was either, although it didn’t stop him from dancing wildly in the middle of the crowd until he had cleared a ten-foot circle around him. Trying to be ladylike as I mopped the sweat off my face with a cocktail napkin, I watched Van carefully sniff his punch before taking a small sip.

“You know, GHB is odorless,” I joked. “If I was trying to drug you, that wouldn’t save you.”

“Heh,” he laughed dryly, “it’s not you I’m worried about.”

I eyed the line of faculty chaperones behind the refreshment table. “Well, I don’t think Dr. Moody is that mad at you.”

“Nah, that dude,” he stared at Sweet Lou who was pawing Stella in a manner that made me turn away in a vain attempt to give them some privacy. “He’s laced with poison, I could smell it all over him.”

Ah, this again. I tried not to roll my eyes and I replied, “I don’t think he’s the sharing type. At least not with you.”

“Better not be,” he grinned and tapped one of the many metal buttons that dotted his vest front. I leaned in and read “Poison Free, That’s Me” in scratchy red letters over a large black X. I wondered vaguely if Wally had noticed it. Right next to it was another button, this one of Felix the Cat with a red X superimposed on his raised hand.

“So what is with all the Xes anyways?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” he grinned. “It’s a very secret society.”

“So secret they wear large metal buttons?”

He ignored me. “You have to swear yourself to secrecy.”

“Secret, right. I got it.”

“You ready?” He leaned in close, his breath warm on my ear.

“Hit me.”

“It’s the secret society… of people who can’t sign their own names!” With that, he leaned back on his heels and laughed so hard that the table shook behind him.

I was disappointed. “No, seriously…”

“Seriously,” he chucked my chin. “I watched too much Sesame Street as a kid. I blame my mother.”

I would’ve pressed him further except right at that moment Jimmie came crashing into us. “Yow-wa!” He squealed with his characteristic ADHD charm, grabbing the cup out of Van’s hand and throwing it back.

“Yah, cuz!” Van seemed utterly unfazed by all this.

“Couple’a punks followed me out a circle. Want to rumble?” Jimmie danced around with excitement, eyes strangely lit.

Van’s smile dropped and he frowned. “Why you always have to be inciting?” Turning to me he added, almost as an afterthought, “Stay here, Leigh.”

“Aw, dude, you know you love it!” I heard Jimmie yell as they quickly exited the back of the gym. “Better than some lame high school prom.”

“What was that all about?” Katie asked sternly, appearing by my side.

“I don’t know,” I said over the funny fluttery feeling in my chest. “But I’m going to find out.”

Katie followed me out the doors, grabbing Stella out of Sweet Lou’s grip on the way. Judging by the large group already forming in the dark recesses behind the old gym, we weren’t the only curious ones.

It took me a dark, fumbling minute to identify Van in the melee but when I did, it took my breath away. He had his wallet chain wrapped around some guy’s neck while Jimmie took gleeful jabs at his face. The guy went down and Van was on to the next one. He punched him hard enough I could hear the crackle from thirty feet away. And then it was over. Cops, school security, teachers, all managed overcame the paralysis that seemed to grip me and ran at the crowd, which promptly scattered.

“Heh,” Van’s breath came in gulping gasps and I took a step back as he grabbed my wrist.

“What was-?” Katie started to demand, her sternest look etched across her face.

“No time,” he swallowed. “Gotta run.” He swiveled quickly, scanning the field behind us.

“Why were-?” Stella shook her head.

“Please,” he spit on the ground and I noticed it was dark against the pale cement. “If they see me…” He nodded to the rapidly approaching onslaught of authorities.

“Um, okay.” I felt jumpy and hyperalert except for some reason I just couldn’t think. “My car…”

“Great!” I did my best to keep my feet under me as we raced across the damp grass but my heels kept sinking into the soft ground.

Chucking my keys to him, I wrenched my arm free yelling, “Just go. I’ll catch up.” I caught a grateful nod before he was off like a shot into the night. The crowd had dispersed just as quickly as it had formed and after a few glances from a passing teacher, the night was quiet again.

“Okay,” Katie said as she picked me up off the grass. “This is so over. I have stood by and watched your foolishness all quarter but this is the last straw. He totally put your life in danger. You are never to talk to him again.”

I bristled at her bossy tone. “I was never in danger!” I huffed. “Except maybe of a broken ankle, thanks to these stupid stripper shoes!” I yanked them off my feet, contemplating leaving them in the grass but I knew my mom would kill me.

“I dunno,” Stella said warily. “Katie’s kind of got a point. That was pretty wild there. You sure you want to be mixed up in that?” This coming from the girl who was dating Sweet Lou.

I swallowed the lump of fear in my throat but it did nothing to slow the adrenaline pulsing through my system. I could only shake my head. Surely there had to be an explanation. “I just need to talk to him,” I said, my voice softer than I intended it to be.

“No, you don’t,” Katie started but Stella quieted her with a hand on her arm.

“Yeah, she does.” Then turning to me she added, “But he had better give you the straight story and it had better be a good one, you know?” I nodded. I understood what they were saying but nothing was making sense right now. “Here,” Stella handed me a wad of Kleenex from her purse. “You’re gonna need these.”

“Thanks,” I swallowed.

“And you call me, girl! Tonight!!”

He was sitting in my passenger seat, completely calm, listening to the radio. “Hey,” he greeted me laconically.

“Hey?” I asked as I climbed in the car and cranked up the heater. “That’s all I get?”

“Oh yeah, and, thanks.” He grinned and leaned in to kiss my cheek.

I pulled away. “Um, explanation please?”

“Just helping out a friend, that’s all,” he rubbed his hands methodically and I glanced down at them. There was blood sprayed across his right hand and the knuckles were already beginning to swell.

I traced my finger over the tattered mess and sighed. “Rock climbing, huh?”

He laughed, the noise quickly swallowed in the dark. “Dude was a brick wall.”

“Are you okay?”

“Oh sure,” he smiled and winked at me. “This is already stopped,” he touched his lower lip. “And all this needs is a few more days and a few less teeth,” he flexed his right hand until all the veins on his forearm stood out.

“Teeth?”

“That’s where I hit him. Looks so glamorous in the movies, doesn’t it? Truth is, it really tears up your hand. I was aiming for his nose but he moved.” His voice was soft and emotionless and I was surprised to see he showed no pain even though his injuries looked plenty painful to me. He laughed, “Kids, don’t try this at home.”

“This isn’t funny,” I said tightly. “You could’ve been killed!”

“But I wasn’t.”

“Well, you could’ve killed somebody!”

“But I didn’t. I know what I’m doing.”

“How often do you do this?” I demanded.

“Too often,” he sighed, looking sad for the first time since it all started.

“Then why?”

“I had to help a friend.”

“Agh!” I dropped my head against the steering wheel. “What friend? Jimmie? Why did those guys want to kill him? Why do you have to fight his fights?”

“They’re our fights,” he said firmly.

“About what?” I was exasperated. Silence filled the inches between us. “Does it have to do with all the X stuff?”

“No!” he yelled louder than necessary and I jumped. “No,” he repeated. “Maybe Jimmie thinks it does but it doesn’t. Don’t listen to Jimmie.” Easy enough – he never talked to me anyhow. “No matter what he says, it’s personal.”

“What, are you like in a gang or something?”

“Um, no.” Van laughed so hard his lip split open again and he grabbed a Kleenex to press against his mouth. “That was so nineties,” he mocked lightly. “Didn’t you hear – Nazis are the new black. And no, I’m not a skinhead either although I might’ve just popped a couple.”

“Can you please be serious for just a minute?” I yelled at him, tears popping into my eyes. “That was, like, really scary for me!”

“Oh, Leigh-a,” he said, dropping his smile immediately and wrapping his arms around me. “I’m so sorry you had to see that. I’m so sorry,” he repeated as I cried into his shoulder. “Sometimes I forget what it must look like. Really, that was nothing. Nobody was in mortal peril, I promise you.”

Wiping my eyes, I spoke into the smoothness of his suit jacket, “It looked bad.”

“Okay, Leigh,” he propped me up so he could look directly into my eyes, “listen. The truth is, you are the best thing that ever happened to me.”

“Van,” I started but he shushed me.

“It’s true. But I also had this whole life before I met you and I can’t just stop being that person, you know? I have people that depend on me, that need me.”

“What? Like your family or something?” I was really trying to understand.

“Well, yeah, like my mom and little brothers for one. But I have this whole other family, like Jimmie and Cole, that I have to take care of too.” He shrugged in a very adult and world-weary way before finishing, “I know I need to get out. But I just can’t right now. I have to find my own way to do it without hurting anyone I care about, ok? And I can’t tell you anymore. You’ll just have to trust me.”

“But,” I protested.

“I have to keep my lives separate,” he stopped me firmly. “That’s just how it has to be for now. I’m sorry.”

“But I don’t know anything about you! Every time I think I figure something out, I’m wrong! Are you trying to make it hard to get close to you?” I said, not a little angrily.

He paused for a long time before answering. “Maybe,” he said thoughtfully. “Maybe I am.”

With that, it was apparent I was going to get no more out of him tonight. But I knew Stella would not be satisfied with that answer.

“Whatever,” I whispered, trying not to sound hurt. “I’ll take you home now.”

“Can you drop me at Jimmie’s instead? Please?” I hesitated. It was a half-hour out of my way to Jimmie’s and frankly, I was going to be cutting it close to curfew as it was. “I just want to make sure he’s okay. I didn’t see him get out.” I didn’t say anything. Personally, I didn’t care if he made out. “Plus, I don’t like my mom to see me like this. She worries.” He flexed his hand again. “And she has enough to worry about these days as it is.”

I sighed. “Yeah, fine.”

………

When we pulled up at Jimmie’s, Van insisted I come in to say hello to Halley and the gang and seeing as my curfew was blown anyhow, I followed him up the rickety steps, the fringe from my dress brushing my legs like spider webs.

“Honey, I’m home!” Van announced as he banged open the screen door that was the only thing between the black mist outside and the black hole inside. I shushed him but it didn’t matter; Halley was up anyhow, her tiny body perched atop a bar stool that was much too tall for the pilfered picnic table. Bare toes gripping the edge, knees up by her ears, she pushed her wispy bangs out of her eyes and looked up from a mass of papers to smile at us.

“Hi honey,” she answered with a touch of sarcasm, completely unfazed by Van’s blood-streaked appearance. “Little Ricky’s in bed and dinner’s in the fridge if you haven’t eaten. It’s from Val’s so it’s safe. She says ‘hey’ by the way.” Despite the fact we had eaten a hearty dinner before the dance, Van sprang wolfishly to the fridge. I took a seat next to Halley, careful to put a newspaper down so my nylons wouldn’t catch on the rough wood. “Wow, Leigh, you look amazing! When Van first showed me that dress, it didn’t seem at all like you but now that I see it on you, I can say that he was totally right!” Van mumbled something from inside the refrigerator and Halley laughed, “Who knew your great taste extended beyond the realm of body art and dumpster fashion to women’s evening wear?”

“I know. She’s gorgeous.” Van offered me a bite of his falafel as I blushed.

A groan from the band room reminded us of Jimmie and Van glanced at Halley. “Right,” she said returning to her paperwork, “you might want to check on him. He took a bad shot to his kidney. I already gave him ice and offered him ibuprofen but he wouldn’t take it.” She shook her head as Van disappeared into the other room, “Men can be such babies.”

“So, um, what are you up to?” With Van gone, I tried to make casual conversation but it sounded forced. I was amazed at how cavalier she was considering the events I had just witnessed.

Sighing deeply, she dropped an envelope on top of a pile and made a check on another piece of paper. “Just paying the bills. I should be grateful I guess – Jimmie and the guys got a gig that actually paid and they waited until after they got the money to get in a fight.” Smiling wryly, she tore open another envelope, “I keep telling him not to play shows in bars, that it just makes him too upset, and yet…”

“Oh, bummer,” I said, trying my best to sound sympathetic despite the fact that I’m sixteen, have no bills to pay and couldn’t get into a bar with even the laxest bouncer and the best fake ID.

Halley hiccuped, then covered her mouth, a supremely awkward gesture that was completely incompatible with her natural loveliness. It made me wonder if she realized how truly beautiful she was. “Okay, enough about me and my oh-so-tragic life. What about you? How are you doing these days? I mean, I feel like I totally know you since Van talks about you all the time,” I blushed heavily and looked at the dark room that had consumed him, “but I’d rather hear it from you.”

I was surprised by her overt friendliness. “Oh, I’m fine,” I answered, wondering if I really was. “We, uh, just went to a dance. You know, a stupid high school thing.”

“Hey, don’t knock high school,” Halley smiled grimly. “It may not be the easiest time in your life but in some ways, it’s the simplest.” She spoke like she was forty but I would be hard-pressed to put her a day over nineteen.

“It doesn’t feel very simple,” I countered. In fact, tonight might go down as the most confusing night of my life so far. I think it even beats out the night before the surprise birthday party my parents threw for me when I was twelve and I cried myself to sleep thinking no one cared about me. “Besides,” I griped, “like you can talk. You can’t be that old.”

“I’m eighteen,” she said softly. “I moved in with Jimmie when I was still in high school.” I didn’t say anything, I was still in too much shock. I mean, here all these kids, my age, that are living on their own, taking care of themselves, having these crazy exciting lives and I’m…still living with my mom, dad and prodigy brother. Before Van, the most exciting thing that happened was our yearly trip to Yellowstone. Halley seemed to think my silence a judgment and hurried to explain, “I mean, I’m not the kind of girl who just shacks up with people. It was just, well, things weren’t ideal at home and I figured I could take care of myself. I mean, I’m a smart girl – valedictorian of my class, even with everything else going on.” She paused to smile proudly, “Besides, I really love Jimmie. I really do.” Her eyes glazed over and she pursed her lips, “Although believe me when I say it only gets more complicated.” Then she laughed and covered her mouth with that same awkward hand. I cringed for her. “Oh, look at me! I’m so much fun tonight. Sorry, peach, I guess bills just depress me.”

“It’s okay. I’m sorry, I didn’t know things were so…” I couldn’t finish my sentence. So…what? Terrible? Wonderful? Crazy?

Halley shook her head and grinned, “So how are you two doing anyhow? Tell me all the details – nothing better than the perfect love story!” She pushed the bills to the side and wrapped her blanket tightly around her bare shoulders. “Van tells me it was fate.”

I hated to crush her fantasy but if the girl could wear a tank top and pajama shorts in this weather, then she ought to be able to handle a little relationship angst. At least it was easier than talking to Stella or Katie. Glancing at the door again, I lowered my voice. “Actually, I don’t know how things are with us. It’s like I’ve just hit a wall or something with him.” She nodded knowingly and I felt reassured so I continued. “I mean, I really care about him but it’s like he just won’t let me in. He lets me get to a certain point and everything’s fun and games but then – wham – he shuts the door on me and tells me that’s just how it is with him.”

Halley’s brow creased and she cocked her head, another too-awkward gesture on the too-beautiful girl, “There’s a lot about Van you don’t know.”

“I know, but…”

“And I think that he doesn’t want you to know. For a reason.” She chose her words carefully.

“Like what? I mean, nobody’s past is perfect. He have a rough family life or something?”

Halley tapped a finger on her lip, “Or something. It’s not my place to talk about it. You ask him, Leigh. He’ll tell you when he’s ready. Just be gentle with him until then. He’s one of the good ones. One of the best, I’d say.”

I smiled and I felt my heart soften a bit. “I know.” I didn’t know how I knew it but I did. I’d known there was something special about him from the first second I’d noticed him.

“And I know, I know, that he cares for you a great deal.”

I giggled and leaned in confidentially. “Tonight he told me that I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to him.” It felt so good to say that to someone.

Halley squealed and clapped her hands, her feet dancing excitedly on the rung of the stool. “He really said that? That’s huge for Van! Just huge.”

“What?” Van said walking up and wrapping his arms around me from behind. “What’s huge for Van? You girls better be talking about that killer air I’m going to get on the ramp at the competition next weekend.”

“Awww, you charmer!” Halley beamed at him. “Kiss that girl now and make my night perfect.” He obliged.

………

The next morning in English, Dr. Moody was surprised by the arrival of a floral delivery person bearing a small plant in a pot. I couldn’t even feign surprise as the guy dropped the plant on my desk, much to the annoyance of Dr. Moody and the amusement of the class. Of course Van was not in attendance to witness my embarrassment. Once everyone stopped staring at me, I tugged the card out of the dirt and read Rumex Patientia L. Considered a ‘noxious weed’ in 45 states, this low-growing plant is a good ground cover in wet climates. The purple flowers are synonymous with springtime in Manchester, England. On the back of the card it said simply Derived from its name and its tenacious adaptability, this plant signifies patience. Very funny Van, especially considering I’m grounded for, oh, like forever.
- posted by Charlotte @ 8:04 AM